November 12, 2024 ()

Taking Responsibility

I was driving toward a traffic light on East Cobb Drive the other day when a woman in a black Maserati SUV backed into my car.  She had tried to make a right turn, pulled halfway into the intersection, and then decided that she didn’t have enough time.  As she backed up rather quickly, I placed my hand firmly on the horn. No avail.  I could see the person behind me had left me no room to back up.  She bumped into the front of my car.

Accidents happen.  Thank God, no one was hurt.  I suspected at the time that there was likely little to no damage.  I waited 30 seconds or so for her to get out of her car, to come over, to make sure everyone was okay.  Only something strange happened.  She didn’t get out of her car.  She didn’t put her flashers on.  Nothing that I would’ve assumed was a typical “I hit you” protocol.  It almost seemed like she was preparing to drive away.

Perplexed, I got out of my car.  I surveyed the damage to both our cars.  Thankfully, our bumpers had a bit of a kiss, and the cars were fine.  Only once I had reentered my car did she get out to look at her car.  As she entered back into her car, I screamed out my window, “no damage, it’s all good.”  No response.  She didn’t seem that interested in talking.  She drove away as fast as she could.

Maybe it was embarrassment.  Perhaps, arrogance.  Call me old-fashioned, but I think it’s symptomatic of a greater problem.

So long as there have been human beings, we have been causing physical damage to each other.  Damage is a fact of life.  All things fall apart.

In Daf Yomi right now, we are in the middle of Bava Kama, a section of the Talmud all about damages.  It chronicles damages falling into all different kinds of categories (one never knew how much damage an ox could do in so many ways) based on levels of intent and responsibility.

Ultimately, however, the underlying message of these messy, dense, pages of Talmud is universal: we have the responsibility not only took look after ourselves but after our fellow human beings, by making some kind of restitution for the damage we cause.  There are different levels of culpability.  But ultimately, we must own our mistakes.  Even the small ones.

Apparently, this lesson is known to a rabbi driving a Honda but escaped this woman driving her 100K Maserati.

I now understand why I paid that extra money for the dashboard camera.

– Rabbi Dan Dorsch

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